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Attitude & Mindset

In a Rut? Do This One Thing For a Mid Year Restart

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This is an update of a post originally published in 2015. I think it is important to take stock of where you are and if it’s where you want to be. If not, make a deliberate change to get on the path.

It is fall as I am writing this. If you made New Year goals, you should be in your “after” situation right now. This was going to be the year, you were going to make the changes you know you’ve been needing to. You were going to establish a healthy, disciplined routine.

Did you?


The Texas coast

The Texas coast

Or maybe you’re on that vacation you wanted to get in shape for. The big trip you bought comfortable shoes for, in anticipation of covering miles of European cobblestone. Perhaps your active vacation was carrying golf clubs on your dream course. I hope some of you got to do that.

We Are All Busy

One of the biggest perks of my job helping people in the gym is that I interact with a large number of the same people on a very regular basis, and I get to see real trends as they happen.

It is fascinating. We are more alike and in tune with each other than we think. When the seasons change and the weather is beautiful, nearly everyone bounds in the gym with energy and optimism.

Likewise, I see moments when the collective sentiment is a very unenthusiastic “blah.” This was the case recently in Austin, and could have been caused by low grade, often undetectable mold allergies, according to a local acupuncturist.

This is why I can say with certainly that if you feel like your year has gotten away from you, you are not alone.

Summer is busy, fall is busier

Summer often passes in a blur of planning and flying by the seat of your pants. You’ve got to plan work and family schedules, childcare, summer camps, and vacation hotels and activities.


So many red dots.

So many red dots.

Regular appointments are subject to reschedules and cancellations, and long vacations end with a pile of emails and to-dos awaiting at the office.

Before we know it, summer turns to fall and the sweet relief of routine. Until after school sports, and new activities. Holidays and holiday planning sneak up.

And so, it is easy to see why our fitness routines fall by the wayside. We are almost a year removed from New Year’s Resolutions, where the abundant optimism of others propels you along too.

What Should You Do?

But you still have goals for your body even when life is busy. You still want your abs to be a little tighter, and your back to be pain-free. So what is a busy person to do?

Something. Anything, but do it now. Do not wait for “the right time” or til life gets a little less busy. It’ll never happen, because as soon as it does, something else gets thrown in your lap.

Healthy, successful people do not wait for the right time.

Your Homework

Pick one thing and commit to doing that one thing. What is that one thing? I don’t know. I’ll give you a list of ideas, but I recommend you take a mental inventory of your strengths. You know yourself and your habits better than anyone else.

Exercise is an extremely nuanced topic we could study forever. There are years-long graduate programs of study in exercise, and hundreds of thousands of research studies on exercise. The big things, however, are well understood: eat well and move your body. You know which of those you are good at, such as cooking a great chicken salad, or committing to morning yoga classes.

Guidelines

Your activity must be something:

  • You can do everyday, or with some regularity

  • You are 95% sure you can maintain

See what we are doing here? We are setting you up to be successful. We are setting you up to win.

The Rules

  • Commit to doing this thing for one month. You can continue on if you like, but it’s perfectly fine to quit at one month.

  • No guilt! No guilt if you miss a day. Just prepare better so you can do it tomorrow.

Give this some thought, then if you choose to commit, give it a real, honest go. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant the action is. You are making a commitment, making positive change, and establishing a habit.

Why Just One Thing?

People do better at change where there is only one change to focus on. After your month, you can pick a different one or add another. Remember, the smallest healthy change you make is better for you the the comprehensive health overhaul that you abandon.

(Reason #2 for just one thing, I always wanted to make a cheesy title like that. “Do this one weird trick!!” Haha!)

Examples:

  • Stretch for 15 minutes every evening

  • Attend yoga or Pilates class 3 times a week

  • Floss your teeth every day

  • Drink 64 ounces of water every day

  • Do this 2 Minute No Sweat Series to start your day

  • Weight train 3 times per week

  • Get 8 hours of sleep every day

  • Cook a healthy breakfast every morning

  • Have 2 boiled eggs every morning for the 12 extra grams of protein

  • Meditate for 15 minutes every day

  • Do a challenging sudoku or crossword puzzle every day

  • Express gratitude every day

  • Give a genuine compliment every day

  • Walk around your block every morning

  • Consume approximately 25/38 grams of fiber per day (female/male, respectively)

One final note. Email me if you need accountability! Email me to tell me your habit! I would love to update this list with healthy habits I haven’t mentioned, and I’m fantastic at nagging, I mean, checking in to see how you are sticking to your plan.

Read next: The craziest thing I did for recovery, and why what I learned still helps me today

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

How to Make Yourself Take Action: Exercise Minute with KVUE

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Happy New Year! Whew! We did it, guys! We made it through the Christmas frenzy. I’m still a little bit Pollyanna: I love Christmas, with all its travel and and gift giving and family loving. 

Even with all the good, it was stressful, and I have a teeny little sense of relief to pack up the Christmas decor until next year. 

 

What Next?

Many people finish the holidays with a little bit of exhaustion, a couple extra pounds, and a lotta bit of guilt. Let me save you lots of time and mental anguish and assure you: 

  • There is no need to detox! Do not take detox tea or wraps. Our kidneys and liver do that for us.

  • There is no need to feel guilty! We are made to seek pleasure from our relationships and meaningful holidays. Turn that attention forward!

Quick, before you keep reading, pull out your phone and make an event on your calendar 7 days from now. Title it “Because I am worth it.”

It’s Not Always So Easy

I’m going to take us back to school for a minute here and introduce you to the Transtheoretical Stages of Change Model. Bear with me; I have found this to be extremely helpful in understanding where people (including me!) are when they approaching making changes in their health, or why they don’t make any change at all. 

Developed by researchers James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente, this suggests that people are not universally in the same place, ready to change. Some people are. Some people are not. 

You can read the full text here, and please take a minute to acknowledge how wonderful it is to be able to read journal text freeeee! Transtheoretical Therapy: Toward a More Integrative Model of Change  

The stages move from less likely to change, to a post-change maintenance phase. For example, consider someone you know who smokes. Some smokers hate the habit and are seeking ways to quit. Maybe they have even already taken action, and tried to quit. Some smokers are just doing their thing, not wanting to quit at all. 


Stages of Change.png

Why is this? Why are some people ready to change, and others not even considering it, and even more confusing, some declaring they are ready to quit, but haven’t taken any steps toward quitting? 

The Stages of Change model suggests that the smoker who has no inclination to change is in the pre contemplative stage. He isn’t even contemplating change. It is nowhere on his horizon to even think about quitting. 

The contemplative smoker is considering it. He has considered quitting, and maybe has a good why: his health, being there for his kids, etc. He hasn’t taken action though. Not quite yet. 

The smoker in the preparation phase has made up his mind to change! He will change, and is actively considering how to. (Personal trainers, THIS is where people are when they call you and request a consult. Help them here, be excited for them! They are going to make progress!) If your friend the smoker is in this phase, encourage him with happiness and support! Take a walk after dinner so he won’t be tempted to light up.

The action phase! This is where it happens! This is where people smoker fewer cigarettes, try the patch, or alter their cigarette buying/smoking habits. This is where people join a gym, exercise, take walks around the block. 

What we want to see is people in the maintenance phase. This means they have been in the action phase and are living in a good habit. They don’t have the mental struggle of not smoking after every meal, or going to the gym every day. This is where we want people to be. This is where I want you to be.

 

Back It Up: Where are You?

The reason I tell you about the Stages of Change: I want you to understand that where you are is OK, and that you shouldn’t feel guilty about not being in maintenance NOW. If you were in pre contemplation yesterday, you won’t be in maintenance tomorrow.

Further, and more importantly, I want you to know you can push yourself toward an action phase. You don’t have to hope it magically comes around. It is peaceful to accept that you are where you are, and you make steps toward where you want to be. Remember, I might not be pre contemplative about my training, but I am about other things in my life. This is good for us all to consider. 

If you are reading this, you are likely in a contemplative or preparatory phase. To push yourself toward the action phase, we are going to look forward and get ready for you to take action!

 

How to Push Yourself to Take Action

Remember that everything is a mental game. We make our schedules, our decisions, our priorities. If exercise and training is truly important to you, begin thinking about why and how you are going to take action. 

Answer these questions:


How precious are they?

How precious are they?

  1. Why is this important to you? Examples:
    – I want to be there for my grandkids. Shoot, not even be there, I want to be on the floor playing with them on Christmas morning! (Aunt Kathryn worked realllll hard to keep up with the kids this Christmas. I want to be able to do that forever!)
    – I want to feel better about my body so I am confident when dating.
    – I want to be able to keep up with everyone else in Austin who seems to have a really active lifestyle. (True story; I am reminded I need to practice cardio more when I get suckered into running around Lady Bird Lake.)
    – I want my butt bigger. No shame, girl! You own your body and you get to make it what you want. Want bigger biceps and chest? Same!

  2. What type of activities do you enjoy? Be honest with yourself! Like I mentioned, I don’t love running. Make me “commit” to a running program, and I will fail. This from a girl who did 26 squat workouts in October. #Squatober

  3. What schedule works for you? Pick a schedule you have a high likelihood of sticking to. Will you workout at lunch time? If so, pack a gym bag with shower sandals, a towel, and soap.

  4. Think about what you need to begin. Aforementioned gym bag, tennis shoes, a bike?

 

Erika Lopez of KVUE and I discuss the importance of choosing a plan, activities you enjoy, and acting on it to begin the New Year in a healthy way. (Both this text and the picture are links.)

Some people think of this as working on New Year’s Resolutions, which makes total sense at this time of year. I want you to apply this action-taking framework anytime of the year, though. You don’t get a free pass if you happen to be reading this mid year! It’s always a good time to do something good for yourself!

 


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Clearly, we are super excited to share this with yall.

 

What Next

Look forward. No more guilt. Consider everything you just thought of. What is popping in your head? Time to join that running group you’ve been meaning to see about? Next time you drive by, park your car at that gym you drive by and look at every day. Maybe you know you should go to the grocery store and make those healthy meals you know how to.

Go back to that date you put in your phone. That’s your goal date. Do that thing, that one starting step, by the date from now. Because you are worth it. 

Then, my friend, you will be in the action phase. 

Guys, I LIVE for updates! Email me or comment below and fill me in on what steps you’ve taken for you! kathryn@kathrynalexander.com

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

How to Stick to Your Resolution to Get Healthy and Why It Is Worth It

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Hi all, this is my first guest post, by author Paige Johnson. She makes some really great points about how to keep committed to your goals. Read on, and let me know if any of these have worked for you! 

How to Stick to Your Resolution to Get Healthy and Why It Is Worth It

Most New Year’s resolutions revolve around getting healthy – whether it’s giving up smoking, cutting all those carbs, or pledging to get out that exercise bike and actually use it. Most New Year’s resolvers also find that come spring, their motivation to stick to their resolutions becomes harder and harder to muster. Don’t feel like a failure – it’s totally normal. 

But there are some ways to re-energize yourself to stick to those resolutions. There are so many benefits – both mental and physical – for leading a healthy and active lifestyle; take the time and make the effort to keep it going this year and don’t put it off until the next time the ball drops. 

Make every day about three pillars of wellness

If you’re trying to lead a healthier lifestyle, you need to practice activities that contribute to overall well-being on a daily basis. It helps to think about this as a three-pronged plan: diet, exercise, and mental fitness.

Every single day you should make sure that you do at least one thing to benefit your diet, your body, and your mind. For example, add vegetables to your dinner, take a 30-minute jog, and practice yoga or meditation. This covers all the bases. 

What you’ll find is that these activities target more than what’s at face value. Exercising will increase your mental health as well. Taking time to meditate and relax will help you make better food choices, and so on. 

Get some help

Don’t be stubborn about achieving your resolution alone. If you’re having trouble keeping it, it may mean that you can’t do it on your own – and that’s ok. If you’re struggling to stay motivated to exercise, find a friend to be your exercise buddy. Not only will it be more fun, but they’ll hold you accountable. If you are struggling to see any gains in your physical fitness, think about hiring a personal trainer that can push you and show you how you can be more efficient in your workouts. If you’re trying to quit smoking or limit your alcohol intake, seek out the support of a group. 

If you think you need to modify or even shift courses on your resolution, don’t be afraid to do so. Strive for something that’s actually achievable. 

Make a monetary investment

Don’t go throwing money away – that’s not going to improve your mental state. But making small financial commitments to your own betterment can help you feel more motivated to succeed. Invest in some exercise equipment, or join a gym. If you’re wanting to cook more and with healthier ingredients, pay for a community supported agriculture plan. There are even apps you can use to pony up cash when you fail to stick to your fitness schedule and earn cash when you do. 

Why should I stick to it?

The benefits of a healthy lifestyle stretch far beyond losing weight and gaining muscle tone. Eating right and getting enough exercise have countless physical benefits, like decreased risk of a variety of diseases. Not only that, but those who practice healthy living are less likely to develop problems with depression and anxiety, and are much less likely to develop problems with drug or alcohol abuse. Committing to living a healthy lifestyle will also influence your family, who will be more likely to follow you down that path. And it also creates plenty of opportunities for your family to get up and get active together. 

If you find yourself struggling to keep your New Year’s resolution to get healthy, you shouldn’t feel like a failure. It’s hard. But instead of giving up and putting it off for next year, take pride in the small victories and use those to build upon your larger goals. 

Paige Johnson loves offering her advice on weight lifting and strength training.

Iron Game Chalk Talk with Ron McKeefery

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Ron McKeefery is a coach I have looked up to for years, so you can imagine how excited I was to be on his podcast, Iron Game Chalk Talk. Coach, thanks for having me! 

Check it out below, and check out his previous podcasts for many more great episodes at RonMcKeefery.com. 

Things we mention: 

A book I love, one of the most instructional books for coaches and trainers: Coach McKeefery’s #1 Amazon International Bestseller “CEO Strength Coach“

Ed Cosner’s PowerSport Strength and Conditioning 

Physical Training for Tactical Populations: An Optimal Approach – Matt Wenning, M.S., and Major Mark Ivejaz. Info here. 

Jocko Willink’s Podcast

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

How Do You Handle Stress?

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How do you handle stress? Busy-ness is the new affliction. Everybody’s got it. Some people thrive in it, some people drown in it. 

Regardless of how well you handle stress, you are probably busy and need to manage stress in your life. 

What do you do to manage stress? Please let me know. I always ask this, and my clients probably think I am endlessly nosy. However, the better I know what works for people, the better I can help people.

This is why I would like your input. What do you do to manage stress? Below is a list of input I have received thus far. I’d like to hear yours! Do you do any of these? Do they work for you? Email me or leave me a comment! I will keep your identity in confidence, of course, if you’d rather email. 

  • Workout
  • Yoga
  • Write in a journal
  • Talk with a friend
  • Shoot clays at the range
  • Take the dog for a walk

How I Handle Stress

My favorite things to relieve stress? Working myself silly at the track or on bleachers, grilling, watching live music, and watching my two favorite football teams! Geaux Tigers and Hook ’em!

LSU Tiger Stadium football
track work exercise as stress management
live music at the hills cafe Austin Tx
how do you handle stress grilling steaks

Ready, go! Let me know. Thank you! 

kathryn@kathrynalexander.com

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

What Real People Do to Be Successful

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Do you ever wonder what other people do to be successful? How do others set themselves up to get their workouts and make smart meal choices?

I wonder too, for a second… then I usually just go ask. I’m nosy, I mean, curious like that.

In the past two posts, I discussed how you can take control of your life and how to do that even in crazy situations. (Parts 1 and 2 here, in case you missed it.) More recently, I went straight to my sources and asked people who get it done how they do it.


When I’m in a time crunch, my go-to solution is to do a full-body circuit: squats, pushups, kettlebell swings, pull ups, military presses, and deadlifts are my best bets when I can only do 15 minutes!

Genevieve Malone, construction management engineer and founder of The Inertia Project


All I think is, “just put my tennis shoes on” and nothing else. Once you take the first step, the rest just follows. I think about how much better I’ll feel after even just 10 minutes of doing something. Exercise is the best investment you can make in your future self. No one ever regretted a workout. 

John Edmiston, firefighter


Meal planning is key. And rotisserie chickens are life.

Becca Ewing, business owner, videographer/photographer


I make an appointment with my trainer that I know I will keep. I try to keep things simple… I won’t drive further than 5 minutes (from home or work) to get to the gym and I actually prefer to jog or bike there too.  Every minute counts.

Tammy Young, Owner/Broker, Realtor®, GRI, Seed Property Group


I prioritize meal prepping, and simplify it. I try to find half an hour to make a batch of chicken and buy a ton of steam fresh veggies. 1 piece of chicken + 1 bag of veggies = a healthier alternative to fast food (if I’m really strapped for time, precooked chicken sausage and a bag of steamfresh veg = yum, plus they come frozen so easy to keep cold if you’re on the go)

Go for lots of walks throughout the day. 5 minutes here, 10 minutes there. Sometimes a walk is also exactly what you need stress wise to just get away. I set a timer to go off every hour for me to get up and walk around for 10 minutes and force myself to do it. So I may not have time to go and “get a workout in” – but I’ve at least been moving and keeping my stress low throughout the day.

Staci Ardison, Rebel Operations, Master of Deadlifts at Nerd Fitness


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Prepare! Take advantage of your “safe spots” around town, where you can count on a healthy meal.

David Archer, contest prep specialist, owner Precision Fitness

I do workouts even if I can’t make it to the gym. My wife and I do home workout videos and we mapped out our neighborhood for walks.

Claude McCan, musician, producer


That's 405 pounds ONE MONTH after he got his prosthesis... that's why I listen to what this guy says...

That’s 405 pounds ONE MONTH after he got his prosthesis… that’s why I listen to what this guy says…

The battle is in your mind. It all starts with your attitude. That’s the number one thing. The physical stuff comes easier once you put your mind to whatever you want.

Stephen Moore, powerlifting coach, personal trainer


I prefer training as opposed to working out. Pick an event, commit to it, and train for it. I love this because there is skin in the game and it motivates me even when I’m busy.

Missy Calkins, Founder of lift[HER]  and VP of Business Development at 401k Marketing


I go on Instagram and look at people who motivate me to go workout.

Alex Hooper, Army Special Forces, Green Beret

Kathryn: Sarah sums this up perfectly, in words I have searched for for years.


That realization that no one can do it for you, no matter what the “it” may be (fitness or another life goal), is both incredibly frightening and, if we allow it to be, completely liberating.

Sarah Buttrill, wife, mother, professional educator, Zumba instructor, musician

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

What to do When Life Gets Crazy: (Taking Ownership, Part 2)

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Last week I covered the importance of taking ownership of your life to get what you want. The process of creating new habits takes effort at the beginning, but it becomes easy once you are in the routine. Your workouts will make you feel good all day and sleep better at night. Healthy meals will help you lose fat and avoid the random energy slumps during the day.

Once this becomes second nature and you are in your groove, you will wonder how you lived before feeling so good. It seems easy. You’ll see.

Then, BAM. Life will hit you.

You’ll get a reminder that you aren’t actually completely in charge. More often than not, it will be a small but significant change that throws off your schedule, such as:

  • a minor injury that doesn’t require extensive treatment but necessitates change in your workouts
  • a change in work schedule
  • a vacation that throws your train off the tracks just long enough to shift your momentum
  • new responsibilities that take more of your time

Not all of these are even bad events. The work change can be because of a promotion, and vacations are sometimes the sweetest parts of life.

How to Handle a Small Disturbance

Plan for one week

These small but significant changes are often temporary. Sometimes you know the time frame, other times they go on indefinitely. In both cases, plan for the upcoming week. Just one week. Pack workout clothes to exercise at a different time of the day and scope out healthy fast food near you. You might even plan for fewer workouts this week, and that is OK! See how you manage this one test week and adjust accordingly.

If do fewer workouts, that’s ok; acknowledge that you are choosing how to spend your time, like you do a fiscal budget. Don’t say “I can’t, I don’t have time.” Acknowledge that your time was better served knocking down your to do list, and that you’re going to get back on it tomorrow or next week.

About Injuries

If you have a small, non serious injury, continue to workout around it. If your wrist is bothering you, don’t skip the gym! Go, and work the things you can. Lunges, step ups, possibly other cardio. Or go for a walk or run! Likewise, if your knee or hip hurts, continue to get your upper body and core stability work in. If getting to the gym takes an almost unreal amount of motivation for you, then it’s even more important that you don’t quit going! Go, and stretch. Go, and work the 3 exercises you can safely. Don’t lose your momentum!

Look to Learn from Others

Look around at other people who are in your position and successfully managing to do what you want to do. Ask the guy in your office who seems really fit how he handles the work hours, home life, and fits in exercise. He might know a killer cafe just off your regular path, or a great little gym you weren’t aware of.

Ask the busiest people you know how they manage their time. (Protip: be respectful of people’s time. Ask a succinct and specific question: “I have noticed that even when you’re super busy, you’re very successful. How do you manage all your work responsibilities, and find time to eat healthy with your family?)

Cut Down On Your Workout Frequency

This might not be what you expected me to say, but it’s absolutely ok. Sometimes you are just in a phase of life where you cannot workout as much. It’s OK to be on a maintenance plan. Re-evaluate your schedule, adjust accordingly, and find the best option. Workout twice a week if that’s all you can do. Take a half mile walk around the block twice a week if that’s all you can manage.

How to Handle a Large Disturbance

Unlike a minor setback, large changes in your life can be tremendously challenging and stressful for long durations. These are the worst of bad situations that only happen a few times in life.

This is when life dumps bad things on you, when everything is wrong, all at once; when you are stretched to your limit emotionally. This is usually serious and painful, like an illness threatening yourself or a loved one, or an extremely challenging work program.

Reframe

Step back and identify your main goal. What do you need to do? Get through residency. Graduate from the fire academy. See your chemotherapy through. Care for your mother, who is caring for your father, who has ALS. Support your wife while she’s exhausted, up with the new baby every 3 hours, all day.

Don’t work toward your exercise goals as aggressively during this time. Remember, these are the times you train for. You train for exactly this, to be healthy when you need to be, to be mentally sound when others need you to be. To have great habits to fall back upon, so that even your “unhealthy” isn’t disastrous.

Be Kind to Yourself

Be honest about what you can do. If you are extremely taxed emotionally or physically, you won’t recover as well, so your workouts cannot be as strenuous. Same scenario if you aren’t sleeping as well.

What do you like to do? Put on your favorite music and stretch? Do that for 10 minutes a day. Get a spontaneous walk around the office when you finished a project early.

In short, remember that moving and eating well will make you feel better, which can make the tougher times easier to handle. However, you must be kind to yourself and give yourself a break if you aren’t your usual superman or woman.

Remember: this too, shall pass.

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

Why is it Important to Take Ownership: Get What You Want

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Taking ownership of your life, your body, your habits, and your results is the most important thing you can do in life.

This will be the most important blog post I write.

More important than any technical info, any recipe, or any magic secret. Taking ownership gives you freedom, control, and means you can get what you want.

Note: the concept of taking control of your life is one I have preached for a long time. (If you don’t control your life, how can you change it?) The word “ownership” and the concept of owning your decisions is one that Jocko Willink espouses. Thank you to Jocko for stating this more eloquently than I have ever even dreamed of.

Did You Workout Yesterday?

Did you workout yesterday? If not, why not? Did you get your workouts last week? If not, do your reasons sound like this:

  • I was so busy.
  • I had an unexpected meeting thrown at me.
  • I was so tired. I got to the end of the day and just couldn’t do it.
  • I forgot my gym bag. Or sports bra, or shoes, etc.
  • My kid got sick and it threw off my whole day.
  • I got roped into a lunch with coworkers.
  • I had a going away meeting with a friend who’s moving. She’s moving, I couldn’t miss that.
  • Oooh, I had a last minute date. Surprise happy hour!

Some of those are legitimate issues. If your kids get sick, you have to take care of them. Getting your job done means attending a meeting you didn’t know you had and working late to meet a deadline you can’t control.

Assess Your Life

You probably don’t have control of every aspect of your life or schedule, but you have control of enough things to be successful. Your responsibility is to identify your weaknesses, your challenges, and how you can overcome those things.

You also need to let go of your excuses. You need to know you can get workouts, plan your food, lose weight and increase strength even with your work and family responsibilities.

Don’t believe me? Look around. Many people in your situation are working full time, volunteering, driving kids around, and still making their health a priority. Somewhere among the 7 billion plus people sharing this planet are many people who have the exact, or almost exact, same scenario as you and overcame it.

They aren’t super moms and dads, uber successful people who get an extra 2 hours a day. They are people who encountered a problem, studied it until found a solution, and planned for it next time. This is all trial and error. They might have missed a workout or two until finding a workable solution, but you can get someone in your situation found that workable solution.

Consider again the reasons you had trouble getting in your workouts last week. Look at those reasons/excuses/roadblocks and be very honest with yourself about them. Are you actually too tired to exercise, or do you just hate your chosen exercise? Honestly identifying these reasons is key. From here, look for patterns. Are you raring to go Monday morning, weekend indulgences fresh on your mind, but tapering off by Wednesday?

Give this real thought. There aren’t right or wrong answers. Don’t feel shame about them. It’s not whining about excuses if you’re actually identifying roadblocks with the goal to eliminate or manage them.

Make a Plan

Take the “I’m too tired” reason for not working out. Perhaps you are so tired and this keeps you from working out 4 days a week. It might not even be an excuse because you are legitimately really tired!

Instead of telling yourself you must just barge through the fatigue, look at other areas in your life. Can you improve your sleep habits so you are more well rested? Perhaps your company treats you to a giant food fest at lunch that makes you crash in the afternoon. Work on feeling rested and it won’t take so much willpower to do your workout.

Knock Down Barriers

Let’s look at another. You forgot your gym bag. Guilty! I used to do it all the time. I’ve started carrying extra clothes in a bag in my trunk, and an outfit that’s nice enough for happy hour or dinner. I can get a workout and go straight from the gym. I don’t have to go home, skip my workout, get ready and then go.

That is preemptively planning for success. I don’t have to refuse last minute invites unless I want to! (Let’s be real; I’m a planner. I am SOOO down for dinner 2 Thursdays from now, 7:15pm).

In a more difficult scenario, you might find yourself at work, facing a deadline when you get a call about a sick kid. It’s hard to leave because you have bosses to whom you are accountable and you’re accountable to your team.

What do you do? You get your kid.

You miss your workout. Thats fine! It’s one day!

If having to leave work to pick up your child was a rare situation because he isn’t often sick and your spouse was out of town, then you don’t have to handle it differently. Take care of your family, eat a good dinner and get your next scheduled workout.

If it is a common occurrence that this makes you miss your workout, make a plan around it. You can do early morning workouts before any interruption, or tougher weekend workouts with quick low intensity exercise mid workday. Many people do this, especially busy people who are accountable most of the business hours. That doesn’t mean it’ll be easy, or fun.

But it will be worth it!

Plan Your Food Too

Food is a huge part of your success whether you’re trying to lose fat, gain muscle, or improve performance. Like you examined your workouts, look back on your diet. What did you eat for breakfast today? Did it push you in the right direction? Did the food and drink choices you made this week help you?

If not, what is the reason? Often it is just lack of preparation. You run out the door in the morning, and grab what happens to be in the fridge. Nothing in the fridge? There’s always that taco truck every day by work. (Or does that only happen in Austin? It feels like they will chase you down with food!) You have to prepare or you’ll end up making do with what aren’t the best options.

Parents often tell me it’s tough making healthy food choices with children. The kid’s tastes are fickle or they have kid birthday parties with sweets and junk food. Many parents have found success modeling healthy eating at home and including the children in the same meals as age appropriate.

As I grew up, my mom explained to me that sweets, such as those at birthday parties, are for special occasions. It made me understand that we can indulge guilt-free, but it doesn’t happen every day.

Include Family in Your Healthy Habits

As you change your habits, expect that you might get some pushback from your spouse, family and friends.

A 2014 study of data from over 2000 adults found that we are genetically more similar to people who choose as our friends than we are to strangers. Perhaps this can explain why people are sometimes threatened by the choices their friends make.

Have you ever noticed that if you decline a drink, or a dessert, people encourage you to “go ahead, have just one!”? Our friends and their habits are so familiar to us, that when we start to change, it affects them too.

However, wouldn’t you want a friend who is abstaining for health reasons to make that healthy choice? Absolutely! Is it Topo Chico in her glass? Vodka soda? As long as she is safe, it shouldn’t matter to us. Remember that this works the other way as well. You get to decide to have a salad, skip dessert, partake in dessert, drink or abstain.

Stand Your Ground

Here is where you have to stand by your decisions. Decide what your goals are and how aggressively you will pursue them. Then consider how it will affect your life and those around you (even if it shouldn’t affect them.)

If you decide to quit drinking for a month but you have a standing happy hour with your party crowd, prepare to (briefly) explain your decision if it comes up and stick with it.

Don’t Fall Into the Busy Trap

Who isn’t busy? Everybody is busy! The only people who aren’t busy are the people who planned well and worked hard to structure a life that allows flexibility. Until we achieve this, we are busy too!

Paradoxically, when you are super busy, life gets easier if you take the harder road. This means planning your workout and putting it on your calendar, packing your bag, and following through. Yes, it is harder to plan tomorrow’s dinner right now, but when dinner rolls around, it is a mental break to eat the healthy meal that is already prepared.

This also means planning your meals, and keeping in mind where you can eat healthy if you have to run out to a restaurant near your work.

To blame being busy, or blame other people’s decisions or circumstances gives those things power. It is a false power, however; they don’t truly have power of you.

Do This Now

Make a plan for tomorrow. Pick 1 thing: exercise, or food. Then, decide how you’ll succeed at that one thing tomorrow. If you pick exercise, decide today what you will do tomorrow, then plan for it! Pack that gym bag, or put your tennis shoes by the front door.

If you picked food, then decide right now what you can eat that will be healthy. Remember, lean protein + veggies + a side of carbs, and lots of water. This means you should stop by the store if you need. Make time for that. Need ideas? Some of my favorite recipes: citrus salmon & broccoli, oven baked Italian chicken & veggies, or my favorite easy breakfast.

Next week, I am going to cover what to do when life gets crazy. I mean crazy: when work owns your life, kids are at camp and every week is different, or a family member has terminal illness. Stay tuned for tips on how to manage being healthy through those times.

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

11 Unhealthy Habits Everyone Should Quit to Make Your Workouts & Life Better

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We are so often told what to do: eat at this restaurant, add this new exercise into your routine, buy this, wear that! What if, instead of doing more and adding more, you would benefit by letting some things go? Bad habits can weigh you down and make your life harder.

My challenge to you is to identify which of these habits you can change for your benefit, and start applying them today. Please feel free to reach out to me if I can help in this process. I’d be honored to help you start living a happier life!

1.  Stop Attaching Your Ego to Your Body

Your self worth and your body are two unrelated things. Yes, I want you to feel great about your body! It is a fantastic thing to have an outward symbol of your hard work and be proud of what you have achieved with your physique. Committing to a workout routine also helps develop discipline and faith in a process.

But these things do not make your self worth. 

They do not make you kind or intelligent or worthy. Even if you skip a workout, break a leg, or gain fat, you are still all the good things you were before. Keep working toward your fitness and physique goals, but remember who you are, what you are good at, and the people you help.  Then hold that in your head regardless of your physical status.

2.  Stop Going After Other People’s Goals.  

For some odd reason, strangers and non strangers alike feel compelled to offer their unsolicited opinions and judgements regarding others’ workouts. “Don’t get too big!”, “Don’t do this exercise or you’ll get bulky.”  “I don’t want to be onstage in a speedo!”  (It’s not a speedo, by the way; nobody’s swimming here.) Why this is acceptable is beyond my comprehension!

You own your body, your time, and your effort, so you get to pick what you work for.

If you want to be a powerlifter, train hard for strength! If you want to compete in a physique contest, it’s ok if your social circle doesn’t understand. You’ll be infinitely more motivated when you are honest with yourself about your goals. Then go at them!

3.  Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

I encourage you to find a training environment where people work hard, have structured goals, smart programs, and compete. I cannot overstate how important it is to be surrounded by people who are smarter, more experienced, and stronger than you are. Training in this type of environment will improve your motivation and results tremendously. You will learn and it will drive you to be better.

However, this does not mean you should look at someone who is the same age, the same weight, or has some other factor in common, and think you should be able to do exactly what that person is doing. Absolutely not! Why? Because you have a different body. You have a different training history.

Work as hard as you can to reach your goals, and your training potential. This might include having mentors and workout partners, and even competitive rivals. That is great!  Chase them! But do not put yourself down because you don’t have the exact abilities as someone else.

4.  Stop Procrastinating

You aren’t going to be in shape, disciplined, and experienced when you start. Just start!  You’ll get stronger and work smarter as you go.  Just start!

5.  Stop Pushing Through Injuries

Many competitors, or people with competitive personalities, are the exact opposite of lazy. This trait is what drives them toward excellence and success, but like Achilles, can also be a downfall. If an injury doesn’t respond to a short period of rest, frequently recurs, or causes debilitating pain, it is not worth pushing through. Know when to go see a doctor to save you damage and time in the long run.

6.  Stop Making Excuses

There is a psychological benefit to making an excuse.  It removes control from you and places it onto another factor, which makes you feel better your actions or inaction. Blaming your busy work schedule for skipping workouts is easy to do, and easy to justify.  You have to make ends meet, right? The problem is, it doesn’t help you. It doesn’t help your family you are working so hard to provide for.

Ever heard the expression, “There is nothing new under the sun”? Literally every problem you can think of, someone else has overcome. Someone out there has had that problem, a worse work schedule, more children to take care of, and still figured out a way to practice healthy habits. If it’s important enough to you, be honest about what you can do, and do it!

7.  Stop Doing Things That Take You Farther Away From Your Goals

We all know the things we should do. Do your workouts, eat your protein and vegetables, go to the dentist, etc.  We check those off a list when we do them. (And you list makers, I know you write them in to your list when you’ve done them, just so you can check them off. Hey, I do it too.)

Consider all the small things that take you farther away from your goals. Skipping a meal, not eating enough protein, not drinking enough water, and staying up too late. These things seem small but they add up. If you are serious about changing your life, your body, and your habits, identify these issues and address them.

8.  Stop Drifting

Write down goals and work toward them. If you don’t have specific goals you are working toward, you roll into the gym when you feel like it, work what you feel like working, and go home when you feel like it. This is okay sometimes. It happens on reload weeks, or on vacation when you are improvising in a different gym, but it really won’t serve you best in the long term. For what to do about this, see below.

9.  Stop Program Hopping

One of the biggest keys to success is following a well designed program. Sure you can make progress without a program, but you’ll get there faster with a program, and who doesn’t want to get there faster? An effective program has a plan, structure, and a big picture. It will stay consistent, or change only slightly, for a period of weeks. Stay with it!

Do not change simply because you’re bored. Do not attempt to “shock your body” by adding a bunch of random crap to your workouts, or by sticking your finger in an electrical socket. Squeeze all the effectiveness you can out of a program by improving upon the workout each time you do it. That’s hard to do when it changes more than you wash your coffee mug.

The best way to find a good program is to seek out a qualified trainer who has experience programming. Talk to the people in your gym to find out who they have worked with, who they liked, and what brought results.

10.  Stop Being in a Rut

This sounds like a contradiction to the previous point, but it is not. Hear me out. A rut does not progress, never changes, and does not deliver results. It may be comfortable, and it may have even delivered results at one time. It doesn’t anymore, but hey, it’s better than nothing, right? Maybe. But why settle for better than nothing? Go for better than that!

11.  Stop Obsessing- Live Life!

Do a little bit of research to find a workout plan that you can stick to. Have faith, give it time, and do it with gusto! Balance out your hard work a positive attitude, good food, and enough sleep. Then go out and have fun! Enjoy your newfound energy, vigor, and live your life!

I’m excited to share these tips with you and cannot wait for you to apply these strategies and experience the benefits in your life. I’m ready to see you succeed!

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

How to Get What You Want: A Foolproof Guide to Setting and Achieving Big Goals, In and Out of the Gym

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Les Brown says, “Shoot for the moon and even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” 

Selena Gomez sings, “The heart wants what it wants.”

I don’t want the moon. Ever since I watched Apollo 13, space flight has seriously freaked me out. I’m grateful for NASA and people with steelier nerves than me, but I am not Elon Musk. This girl enjoy warm showers and abundant oxygen.

What if your heart really doesn’t know what it wants? There was a time when knew I didn’t like my job, and I had aspirations of improving myself, being happier, living for the moment and other regurgitated platitudes, but I didn’t know how to get there. Those are emotions, not actionable goals. They are vague. How do you get there, that ambiguous place where you are happy and present? Where is there? 

Further, how do I know what my heart wants? This is also a vague question. Not every person knows from a young age exactly what career path or life goal he or she wants. Often, people are in painful situations precisely because they don’t know what they want. As for me, I’m a literal person. My masters degree is clinical exercise physiology. Between the AV node, QRS complex and cardiac output, I think my heart is just telling me to go run more stairs.


Goal Setting Takes Work

Goal setting can be hard, both in life and in the gym. It takes deep thought, consideration, and time to decide what you want out of life. What you are really deciding on is where to spend your time and that is a hugely difficult decision! Time is the most valuable resource, one that no brilliant researcher or billionaire has found a way to create more of. 

What is most worthy of spending your time working toward?

You Start Where You Start

Begin by acknowledging this: you start where you start. You can try to deny it and jump ahead, but it will only hurt you. You are in a factual situation; if you are 15 credits and a thesis away from a degree, you have 15 credits and a thesis to go. If you can squat 150 pounds, you can squat 150 pounds. In the gym, trying to skip steps and start at a place too advanced can hurt you. There is no shame in starting where you are.

How to Decide What You Want

Get out your calendar right now. Schedule two separate half hour chunks of time where you sit down and think.

At this first session, sit by yourself, put your phone on airplane mode in the next room over, and let your mind wander. This is a brainstorming session in which you don’t cut down anything. You can decide later if it’s a bigger goal than you are willing to work toward. For now, just think about possibilities. 

Ask yourself these questions: 

  • What do I want my ideal workday to look like one year from now? 


I want to  teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too.

I want to  teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too.

  • Where do I want to retire? 
  • Who am I good at helping?
  • What am I good at doing?
  • What do I enjoy doing?
  • What do I need to be happy?
  • What do I want to be happy?

These are malleable goals. Do not stress yourself into thinking there is one perfect vision of life you are chasing. You can adjust goals as you go. People naturally do this all the time. College students begin by declaring a major, take some classes, and either confirm their decision or change it. People in the workforce have mid-life career changes and restructure their whole lives to change jobs.

In the gym, people begin working toward one goal and shift toward another. Bikini competitors begin train for a show and realize they like powerlifting. Crossfitters will begin prescribed workouts and decide to focus on Olympic lifting. These things are allowed to happen! They are all part of finding what you naturally enjoy and do well.

How to Decide What You Want, Session 2

At your next half hour goal session, rewrite these thoughts into more accomplishable goals. Take these point by point and break them down into less abstract feelings and more concrete action steps. 

For example, my brainstorming session 1 looked similar to this: 

I want to be happy! I want to be flexible and live on my own terms. I’m not happy in an office 40 hours a week, and I always gravitate back toward the gym, even though the last “office job” I had was in fitness and only a few hours a day at a desk. One of my favorite things in the gym is teaching the deadlift for the first time, and watching people realize they are stronger than they thought. 

I want to help people. I hate hate hate ALS and want to help people with it, but I keep getting my tender heart broken every time I get to know another patient who is living with ALS. How can I help and not be sad all the time?  We need to find a cure. 

I want to go to Paris again, and travel more! I want to learn French, but I could spend all that time reading more exercise research. Hmm. 

To accomplish: drive my big lifts up (bench press, deadlift, squat). Get big shoulders. Also I want to want to do yoga, but haven’t decided if I want to. 

Longer term goal: I will have a condo by Tiger Stadium to stay in when I go to football games. 


True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don't speak …

True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don’t speak French.

These are a good start. They are inherently pretty vague and selfish. Take the first one, for example. “Be happy, and live on my own terms.” Yes, we all want to be happy. That’s froo froo talk. What does it take for me to be happy? For starters, enjoying what I do for work. I can’t just clock in and clock out. Happiness also means seeing live music often, since that is my favorite pastime outside the gym. Spending time with my family is a priority.


Regarding my rambling goals about helping people: this is a great start too. James 2:26 says, “Faith without works is dead.” Similarly, it is a kind intention to want to help people, but I need to act on it. Instead of just sending well wishes into the atmosphere, I am going to volunteer with Max’s Ride (a non-profit motorcycle ride and concert which benefits ALS patients), and the ALS Association. 

From looking at these first two points with the goal to act on them, I can say that to be happy, and fulfilled, I need to teach lifting as a career. I love reading science journals, so the ethical continuing education is enjoyable for me. I will make it a point to get my friends together to watch live music, visit out of town family members, and volunteer with local organizations against ALS.

Pull out your brainstorming list and think strategically about how to make those softer goals more tangible. Nothing is wrong with the softer goals, but if you can’t think of a plan to reach them, you probably won’t reach them.

Make 1, 5, and 10 Year Goals

Now that you have made a big, general brainstorm about what you want out of life, and you’ve restructured those wants into processes to reach them, think about that career question again. What do you wish your ideal workday looked like today? 

Perhaps you would wake up, take your children to school, and head to the office. It’s not a cake walk, but you get some concentrated, hard work done on a satisfying challenge. At a good break point, you head to the gym, blow off some steam and sweat a bit, and head home for a cell-phone free dinner with the family. 


I'm a happy girl if I can watch live music every week.

I’m a happy girl if I can watch live music every week.

Perhaps you ideal day begins with a workout. You sweat it up while thinking about that vacation you are planning, and the business you are building to get there. You invest your work and time heavily into yourself, have lunch with a mentor, then put your head back in the game a few more hours before heading off to happy hour to watch a band with friends. 

Your ideal life routine might be different from either of those scenarios. Consider your ideal routine, and ask yourself if it is do-able. Can you imagine it being a realistic scenario? Given 10 years, do you think you can organize your life in a way that you reach that ideal day? It might be more realistic than you think.

Think about what you wish you had done 10 years ago. What do you wish you had started 10 years ago that you could be working with today? You probably have not just 10 years, but decades ahead of you. You have time to achieve gigantic goals. You just have to identify those goals and work toward them.

5 Year Goals


It’s pretty safe to say that by now, you’ve thought of some 10 year goals. Hopefully you were honest about what you want to have/work toward, and didn’t chalk any up to just being a pipe dream. To help get you there, think about your halfway point. These are your 5 year goals. Let’s take my last brainstorm point, which is to own a condo by Tiger Stadium. It’s doesn’t need to (and won’t) happen by this football season, but I’d really like it to happen. Like many goals, the way to achieve this one is simple: I can begin by saving money, which will allow me to have a large down payment by the time I am ready to act on this. 

1 Year Goals


Think of these like your to do list. You can start on these now. Right now. Make a plan to go by the bank tomorrow and open a new savings account. Deposit a certain amount of money in it each month. Research non-profits to be involved in, with the goal to commit a certain number of hours to it each month. Find a gym you will go to twice a week, a trainer or accountability partner, and do it.

Do you remember the ice bucket challenge? I was lucky enough to be able to jump right in since I was volunteering with the ALS Association. It did great things for advocacy and awareness for ALS!

Body Goals

Relating specifically to body goals I want you to really think about what you want. Without inhibition, without guilt, without shame. You own your body. You get to choose your goals. Nobody else. I’ve had several clients females who were very hesitant to share their goals with me. I knew there were things left unspoken so after some gentle but persistent prodding they shared with me that they felt it was unfeminist to have vain body goals.

I think it’s the opposite. A very liberated individual is entitled to feel great in her own skin. You are the only person in your own skin. You have to live in your body all day. If you don’t like how your clothes fit, YOU wear the discomfort all day. Don’t you deserve better? You have to be uncomfortable walking upstairs if you’re out of shape. You have to look in the mirror and feel good or bad about yourself. You own your body and you have every right to decide how you look how you feel and what you want. Feminist or not, you’ll have the right to set your own goals without consulting others. 


Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself. http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/

Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself. 

http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/

And you deserve to feel good in your skin. You own your body.

If you are on a restrictive diet, you’re the one who feels hungry all day, and if you have an eating disorder you’re the one who bears the burden all the time. You owe it to yourself to take care of your health. Your body is an outward manifestation of your health. Who cares what other people want you to look like? You decide for yourself what you want.

 

 

 

Tell Me Your Goals

I am fascinated by the decisions people make. What do you want? What are you working toward? How can I help you get there? Let me know! Email me now. kathryn@kathrynalexander.com


Gabrielle d'Estrées et une de ses soeurs, which hangs in the Louvre.  Gabrielle pinches her sister's nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled.

Gabrielle d’Estrées et une de ses soeurs, which hangs in the Louvre.  Gabrielle pinches her sister’s nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled.

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.

Mean People and Sissy Squats

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I was 27 the first time I snow skied. Not exactly prime time for learning new motor skills, but I was positive I’d get the hang of it. Everybody skis. Besides, I know my functional anatomy, and I’m kinda athletic. Those things should count. Right? Ha.

Beginner lessons started at 10:00 am, but we southern snow bunnies hit the slopes earlier than that. We got our boots and skiis, bought me a big dorky helmet, and clomped over to the baby hill. I felt restricted by all those layers of clothes, and had zero dexterity with those gloves on. The sight of me walking in the boots even without skis was probably comical. We carried on.

The approximate .5% grade of the hill was actually enough fun for me to really enjoy my first few runs. I don’t know that anyone in the history of skiing has ever gone slower, but at least I didn’t have to worry about falling or running anyone over.

Come lesson time, the instructor divided us into categories. Since I had already put on my boots and skis and run the baby hill, she sent me to a group she labeled level 3.  I protested; “No no, I want to learn from the beginning… I’ve never been in snow before yesterday.” She assured me I would be bored in Level 1, so I acquiesced.

We Level 3s did a few test runs down the little slope I had practiced earlier. “Lookin’ good,” I thought. This is fun!


Here I am demonstrating a sissy squat, which enabled me to "pop up" like a kid after falling in the snow. Notice my torso is upright, which makes the squat harder. If this is too difficult, hinge forward at the hips as you descend. The long cou…

Here I am demonstrating a sissy squat, which enabled me to “pop up” like a kid after falling in the snow. Notice my torso is upright, which makes the squat harder. If this is too difficult, hinge forward at the hips as you descend. The long counterbalance of the machine is similar to skis in the way it anchors you to the ground. Imagine those are skis. Imagine I am freezing. The mittens are to help you envision the bitter cold.

Next we loaded up onto the ski lift, which I managed to do without embarrassing myself. I got this. The view was fantastic, and I soaked it in. By the time I looked down, I felt like it should be letting us off. It just kept going. And going. We dismounted at the top of a hill which was a wee bit outside my comfort zone.


The ski lift of death.

The ski lift of death.

I made my way down the slope, making a wide slalom pattern so as to not pick up too much speed. I did let myself move a little faster as I went along, and really began to enjoy it. For a minute, I forgot the encumbrances of layers of clothes, gloves, goggles. The cold didn’t cross my mind. The skis didn’t seem like giant sticks tied to my feet. It was almost exhilarating.  Not exhilarating yet, but I could see the promise.

Suddenly I realized our class was stopped about halfway down the slope. I was moving at this point. Not fast, mind you, but moving, and I suddenly had to stop. I didn’t know how. I didn’t know how to stop. Pizza french fries, pizza french fries! Pizza panic!!

For every skier who is reading this, I ask for a bit of empathy, ok? Regardless of how easy it seems to you, I didn’t know what to do. I was on a collision course with the instructor and an audience of my classmates, and pizza wasn’t working. Rather than knock her out (which in hindsight would have been the proper course of action) I bailed. Yes, I threw myself onto the ground because I didn’t know how else to stop.

The instructor was highly amused. Had she not been so scornful, I think she would have laughed harder. I don’t remember her exact words, but I remember how she made me feel, laying there a cold mess in the snow. She mocked me in front of everyone but never bothered to teach me how to stop.

And so, that is how I skied for the duration of the week. I tempered my speed, and chose a fluffy snow pile to fall into when I needed to stop. Better than running over a kid or breaking a leg.


Stylin'.

Stylin’.

The instructor continued to think I was hilarious, and made mention of it for the remainder of the lesson. She was in her 50s. Plenty old enough to know she should treat people kinder. Or do her job, for goodness sakes and HELP ME. Luckily for her, I was a much more patient and reserved person back then, and I held in my anger.

I literally had to pep talk myself on that mountain. I told myself I am worthy.  After all, I am a child of God! Some people love me! I may not be good at skiing, I am good at something! Put me in a gym and I can show you something! Really, I told myself that my strength is working out, literally and figuratively, and that reminder kept my head up.

How Are Your Workouts Going?

Where are you now with your fitness goals? Did you make New Year’s Resolutions 8 weeks ago? Have you started a new workout plan, or health habit?

New Year’s feels like so long ago! Many people have fallen off the wagon, broken resolutions, missed workouts. Is that you? If so, why?

I want to talk specifically about gyms. Utilized properly, well equipped gyms will give you the opportunity for the best results. Boot camps, outdoor workouts, group exercises classes, and workout DVDs certainly provide some health benefits. If those are your favorite things, by all means, continue with those.

But, if you aren’t reaching your goals despite putting in time and energy, look into adding resistance training to your routine. Join a gym. (Need more convincing? Read here.) You don’t have to be a gym rat or a workout zealot to make it work for you. You just have to realize that a well designed program is a tool to get you where you want to be. You don’t have to love it, even though many people grow to.

Even in gyms, experienced lifters have strengths and weaknesses. The best Olympic lifters aren’t the best powerlifters. Even among the powerlifters, the best squatters aren’t always the strongest deadlifters. Don’t let others in the gym intimidate you, because they are bad (and good) at different things too.

Therein lies your challenge: find the right workout for you. I encourage everyone to learn the basic movements. Squats, deadlifts, overhead press, chest press, and pulls. Modify as you go.  Skip exercises that cause pain. Add exercises specific to your goals.

Most importantly, remember: you do not have to be the best at it.  You just have to do it.  

Are you an accountant? A marketing manager? A mom or dad? You’ve probably spent your whole life working in a career outside the gym, or two. Of course you won’t walk in and be the best at it. You might not even be comfortable with it. That’s ok; you just have to do it.

Don’t compare yourself to experienced lifters and think you should be able to do what they do. Remember all the things you can do. You can probably play an instrument, provide advice on a niche subject, and learn new things. Those things make you YOU. Keep those things in your head, and then seek out the advice of a certified, intelligent trainer, and learn lifts that will help with your physique and performance goals.

Redemption

In the end, the Witch of Steamboat Springs paid me one of the best compliments I’ve ever received. She said that she’s never seen an adult get up after falling as easily as I did.  She said only children get up that easily, and that I just “pop up”. Fitting that her compliment referenced how many times I fell. What she didn’t know is that getting up in skis is just a sissy squat. Your feet stay anchored in skis or a sissy machine, and you just extend your knees (use your quads) to stand back up.

The incident taught me 2 other things: 1, I vowed to never make anyone feel as small as she did to me. That’s not the way to coach people. 2, I have weaknesses, yes. But I also have definitive strengths. I carry that thought with me and it gets me through situations where I am less experienced.

Surely we will fall again. We will ski into a snowbank, miss a lift, be short with someone, or miss an opportunity to show someone love. But what do you do? Get back up. Remember your worth. Tell yourself what you are good at, what you can do. Then get up, do it again, and do it better.


This view...  almost made it all worth it.  Yes, it was worth it.  Steamboat Springs 2011.

This view…  almost made it all worth it.  Yes, it was worth it.  Steamboat Springs 2011.

About the author

Kathryn Alexander is a strength coach and personal trainer in Austin, Texas. She loves hiking, college football, and the feel of a perfectly knurled barbell. Read more about Kathryn here.