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In a Rut? Do This One Thing For a Mid Year Restart

September 3, 2018 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

This is an update of a post originally published in 2015. I think it is important to take stock of where you are and if it’s where you want to be. If not, make a deliberate change to get on the path.

It is fall as I am writing this. If you made New Year goals, you should be in your “after” situation right now. This was going to be the year, you were going to make the changes you know you’ve been needing to. You were going to establish a healthy, disciplined routine.

Did you?


The Texas coast

The Texas coast

Or maybe you’re on that vacation you wanted to get in shape for. The big trip you bought comfortable shoes for, in anticipation of covering miles of European cobblestone. Perhaps your active vacation was carrying golf clubs on your dream course. I hope some of you got to do that.

We Are All Busy

One of the biggest perks of my job helping people in the gym is that I interact with a large number of the same people on a very regular basis, and I get to see real trends as they happen.

It is fascinating. We are more alike and in tune with each other than we think. When the seasons change and the weather is beautiful, nearly everyone bounds in the gym with energy and optimism.

Likewise, I see moments when the collective sentiment is a very unenthusiastic “blah.” This was the case recently in Austin, and could have been caused by low grade, often undetectable mold allergies, according to a local acupuncturist.

This is why I can say with certainly that if you feel like your year has gotten away from you, you are not alone.

Summer is busy, fall is busier

Summer often passes in a blur of planning and flying by the seat of your pants. You’ve got to plan work and family schedules, childcare, summer camps, and vacation hotels and activities.


So many red dots.

So many red dots.

Regular appointments are subject to reschedules and cancellations, and long vacations end with a pile of emails and to-dos awaiting at the office.

Before we know it, summer turns to fall and the sweet relief of routine. Until after school sports, and new activities. Holidays and holiday planning sneak up.

And so, it is easy to see why our fitness routines fall by the wayside. We are almost a year removed from New Year’s Resolutions, where the abundant optimism of others propels you along too.

What Should You Do?

But you still have goals for your body even when life is busy. You still want your abs to be a little tighter, and your back to be pain-free. So what is a busy person to do?

Something. Anything, but do it now. Do not wait for “the right time” or til life gets a little less busy. It’ll never happen, because as soon as it does, something else gets thrown in your lap.

Healthy, successful people do not wait for the right time.

Your Homework

Pick one thing and commit to doing that one thing. What is that one thing? I don’t know. I’ll give you a list of ideas, but I recommend you take a mental inventory of your strengths. You know yourself and your habits better than anyone else.

Exercise is an extremely nuanced topic we could study forever. There are years-long graduate programs of study in exercise, and hundreds of thousands of research studies on exercise. The big things, however, are well understood: eat well and move your body. You know which of those you are good at, such as cooking a great chicken salad, or committing to morning yoga classes.

Guidelines

Your activity must be something:

  • You can do everyday, or with some regularity

  • You are 95% sure you can maintain

See what we are doing here? We are setting you up to be successful. We are setting you up to win.

The Rules

  • Commit to doing this thing for one month. You can continue on if you like, but it’s perfectly fine to quit at one month.

  • No guilt! No guilt if you miss a day. Just prepare better so you can do it tomorrow.

Give this some thought, then if you choose to commit, give it a real, honest go. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant the action is. You are making a commitment, making positive change, and establishing a habit.

Why Just One Thing?

People do better at change where there is only one change to focus on. After your month, you can pick a different one or add another. Remember, the smallest healthy change you make is better for you the the comprehensive health overhaul that you abandon.

(Reason #2 for just one thing, I always wanted to make a cheesy title like that. “Do this one weird trick!!” Haha!)

Examples:

  • Stretch for 15 minutes every evening

  • Attend yoga or Pilates class 3 times a week

  • Floss your teeth every day

  • Drink 64 ounces of water every day

  • Do this 2 Minute No Sweat Series to start your day

  • Weight train 3 times per week

  • Get 8 hours of sleep every day

  • Cook a healthy breakfast every morning

  • Have 2 boiled eggs every morning for the 12 extra grams of protein

  • Meditate for 15 minutes every day

  • Do a challenging sudoku or crossword puzzle every day

  • Express gratitude every day

  • Give a genuine compliment every day

  • Walk around your block every morning

  • Consume approximately 25/38 grams of fiber per day (female/male, respectively)

One final note. Email me if you need accountability! Email me to tell me your habit! I would love to update this list with healthy habits I haven’t mentioned, and I’m fantastic at nagging, I mean, checking in to see how you are sticking to your plan.

Read next: The craziest thing I did for recovery, and why what I learned still helps me today

Filed Under: Attitude & Mindset Tagged With: start here, training, where to start

Why Gym Memberships Are an Amazing Value

August 30, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander 2 Comments

To celebrate back to school time, let’s do math! 

A word problem:

Sally joins a gym for $60 a month. She goes 3 times a week faithfully and loses fat, gets stronger, and feels amazing. She even sleeps better and feels more confident at work! 

All this for $4.28 a pop. ($60 divided by 14 visits in a month like August.) 

Let’s assume she actually enjoys being at the gym and goes 4 times a week. That would be $3.33 a visit! Where else can you go for $3.33 an hour, while simultaneous improving yourself, your health, and your future?

Hint: It’s not actually a math problem.

It’s kind of rhetorical, but it has an answer. The answer is, nowhere!

Nowhere else is as economically rewarding as a gym!


"CAN YALL PUT IN A PUNCHING BAG PLEASE". He was very polite.

“CAN YALL PUT IN A PUNCHING BAG PLEASE”. He was very polite.

I understand the phrase “different strokes for different folks” and I get that not everyone enjoys the gym, but I have never understood why people balk at the price of a gym membership. 

It’s $30-$60 a month for an activity many people enjoy. This can take 2-6 hours of your week and put it to good use, while you are surrounded by like-minded people.

For $30-$60. (Don’t pay more; the mega gyms are crap. Oh, and don’t pay less. Planet Fitness is worse crap.)


"Please put in a punching bag if possible."

“Please put in a punching bag if possible.”

What else are you going to do with that amount of time that will be as productive, enjoyable, and beneficial to your health? Nothing! 

I can’t think of a cheaper hobby! I grew up a horse lover, and can I tell you how much more money I have now that my hobby is at the gym and not the barn? Lots!

What else are you gonna do with that time? Happy hour? $10 drinks? Or worse, shop, like my idle hands do? The safest place my wallet can be is at the gym.

Life is short. Spend it somewhere you enjoy!

More importantly than the economics of it, we have one short life. Spend it somewhere good!


"Punching Bag - Thanks". Still polite. 

“Punching Bag – Thanks”. Still polite. 

Have you heard theory of the third place? Ray Oldenberg suggested our third place is where we go after work (our second place) and before home (our first place). It is a place we choose to go, where we enjoy the social interaction. More info here. 

Gyms are our third place. They are where we want to go, and hang with people who want to be there. They understand our drive, our sticking points, and see us through them. They become our friends and sometimes chosen family.

Join the boxing gym!

I found something interesting today. Interesting in a trippy, time-warpy kind of way. It was a peek into human psychology, and it equally frustrated and amused me, as my mom and sister can attest. 


"punching bag in here would be a great addition Thanks"

“punching bag in here would be a great addition Thanks”

My sister came across these notes tucked in an old brief case of mine. They were from one of two gyms I worked at concurrently many years ago. I can’t be sure of which gym, and I’m definitely not violating any confidentiality issues here. 

I wasn’t the manager or owner of this gym, and I can assure you good gym owners love feedback. I’m certainly not complaining about this guy’s wanting a punching bag.

But, here’s this guy’s problem: he is looking for a niche activity in the wrong place. He is looking for a boxing gym in a health club. Yes yes, I know some clubs have heavy bags and speed bags, but if he really wants to box, he should go to a boxing gym. 

If he’s a good boxer, he will need better equipment than a multi-use gym facility will provide. He would outgrow the basic heavy bag and still not be happy with this gym set up. Also if he is or aspires to be an accomplished boxer, it will be worth it to him to be around other boxers, people he can sweat with and learn from.


"More Free Weights and punching bag"

“More Free Weights and punching bag”


"Punching Bag Please"

“Punching Bag Please”


"Punching Bag Please"

“Punching Bag Please”

I encourage everybody to join a gym or a group. Whether it’s a regular neighborhood gym or a specialized gym, it will be worth it! 

So here’s my advice for this dude with the bee in his…boxers. Join a boxing gym. Just do it! Join a boxing gym!! 


"It would be wonderful to have a punching bag to get my perfect body on." I never met the guy but I like him; I bet he's got a great sense of humor!

“It would be wonderful to have a punching bag to get my perfect body on.” I never met the guy but I like him; I bet he’s got a great sense of humor!

It’s worth the money if it’s that important to you. 

It’s worth the money if you’ll get that much enjoyment from it.

 

What’s the takeaway? Join a gym! Find your niche. It could be a regular fitness gym, a specialized gym, but join somewhere you want to go. Be grateful that you have somewhere to multitask so hard: get healthy, improve yourself, save money and bad calories you’d be wasting elsewhere, and be in good company! 


I'm not sure if they ever got a punching bag. I hope he found his place!

I’m not sure if they ever got a punching bag. I hope he found his place!

Filed Under: Training Tagged With: where to start

How to Get What You Want: A Foolproof Guide to Setting and Achieving Big Goals, In and Out of the Gym

May 1, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

Les Brown says, “Shoot for the moon and even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” 

Selena Gomez sings, “The heart wants what it wants.”

I don’t want the moon. Ever since I watched Apollo 13, space flight has seriously freaked me out. I’m grateful for NASA and people with steelier nerves than me, but I am not Elon Musk. This girl enjoy warm showers and abundant oxygen.

What if your heart really doesn’t know what it wants? There was a time when knew I didn’t like my job, and I had aspirations of improving myself, being happier, living for the moment and other regurgitated platitudes, but I didn’t know how to get there. Those are emotions, not actionable goals. They are vague. How do you get there, that ambiguous place where you are happy and present? Where is there? 

Further, how do I know what my heart wants? This is also a vague question. Not every person knows from a young age exactly what career path or life goal he or she wants. Often, people are in painful situations precisely because they don’t know what they want. As for me, I’m a literal person. My masters degree is clinical exercise physiology. Between the AV node, QRS complex and cardiac output, I think my heart is just telling me to go run more stairs.


Goal Setting Takes Work

Goal setting can be hard, both in life and in the gym. It takes deep thought, consideration, and time to decide what you want out of life. What you are really deciding on is where to spend your time and that is a hugely difficult decision! Time is the most valuable resource, one that no brilliant researcher or billionaire has found a way to create more of. 

What is most worthy of spending your time working toward?

 

You Start Where You Start

Begin by acknowledging this: you start where you start. You can try to deny it and jump ahead, but it will only hurt you. You are in a factual situation; if you are 15 credits and a thesis away from a degree, you have 15 credits and a thesis to go. If you can squat 150 pounds, you can squat 150 pounds. In the gym, trying to skip steps and start at a place too advanced can hurt you. There is no shame in starting where you are.

 

How to Decide What You Want

Get out your calendar right now. Schedule two separate half hour chunks of time where you sit down and think.

At this first session, sit by yourself, put your phone on airplane mode in the next room over, and let your mind wander. This is a brainstorming session in which you don’t cut down anything. You can decide later if it’s a bigger goal than you are willing to work toward. For now, just think about possibilities. 

Ask yourself these questions: 

  • What do I want my ideal workday to look like one year from now? 


I want to  teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too.

I want to  teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too.

  • Where do I want to retire? 
  • Who am I good at helping?
  • What am I good at doing?
  • What do I enjoy doing?
  • What do I need to be happy?
  • What do I want to be happy?

 

 

These are malleable goals. Do not stress yourself into thinking there is one perfect vision of life you are chasing. You can adjust goals as you go. People naturally do this all the time. College students begin by declaring a major, take some classes, and either confirm their decision or change it. People in the workforce have mid-life career changes and restructure their whole lives to change jobs.

In the gym, people begin working toward one goal and shift toward another. Bikini competitors begin train for a show and realize they like powerlifting. Crossfitters will begin prescribed workouts and decide to focus on Olympic lifting. These things are allowed to happen! They are all part of finding what you naturally enjoy and do well.

 

How to Decide What You Want, Session 2

At your next half hour goal session, rewrite these thoughts into more accomplishable goals. Take these point by point and break them down into less abstract feelings and more concrete action steps. 

For example, my brainstorming session 1 looked similar to this: 

I want to be happy! I want to be flexible and live on my own terms. I’m not happy in an office 40 hours a week, and I always gravitate back toward the gym, even though the last “office job” I had was in fitness and only a few hours a day at a desk. One of my favorite things in the gym is teaching the deadlift for the first time, and watching people realize they are stronger than they thought. 

I want to help people. I hate hate hate ALS and want to help people with it, but I keep getting my tender heart broken every time I get to know another patient who is living with ALS. How can I help and not be sad all the time?  We need to find a cure. 

I want to go to Paris again, and travel more! I want to learn French, but I could spend all that time reading more exercise research. Hmm. 

To accomplish: drive my big lifts up (bench press, deadlift, squat). Get big shoulders. Also I want to want to do yoga, but haven’t decided if I want to. 

Longer term goal: I will have a condo by Tiger Stadium to stay in when I go to football games. 


True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don't speak …

True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don’t speak French.

These are a good start. They are inherently pretty vague and selfish. Take the first one, for example. “Be happy, and live on my own terms.” Yes, we all want to be happy. That’s froo froo talk. What does it take for me to be happy? For starters, enjoying what I do for work. I can’t just clock in and clock out. Happiness also means seeing live music often, since that is my favorite pastime outside the gym. Spending time with my family is a priority.


Regarding my rambling goals about helping people: this is a great start too. James 2:26 says, “Faith without works is dead.” Similarly, it is a kind intention to want to help people, but I need to act on it. Instead of just sending well wishes into the atmosphere, I am going to volunteer with Max’s Ride (a non-profit motorcycle ride and concert which benefits ALS patients), and the ALS Association. 

From looking at these first two points with the goal to act on them, I can say that to be happy, and fulfilled, I need to teach lifting as a career. I love reading science journals, so the ethical continuing education is enjoyable for me. I will make it a point to get my friends together to watch live music, visit out of town family members, and volunteer with local organizations against ALS.

Pull out your brainstorming list and think strategically about how to make those softer goals more tangible. Nothing is wrong with the softer goals, but if you can’t think of a plan to reach them, you probably won’t reach them.

 

Make 1, 5, and 10 Year Goals

Now that you have made a big, general brainstorm about what you want out of life, and you’ve restructured those wants into processes to reach them, think about that career question again. What do you wish your ideal workday looked like today? 

Perhaps you would wake up, take your children to school, and head to the office. It’s not a cake walk, but you get some concentrated, hard work done on a satisfying challenge. At a good break point, you head to the gym, blow off some steam and sweat a bit, and head home for a cell-phone free dinner with the family. 


I'm a happy girl if I can watch live music every week.

I’m a happy girl if I can watch live music every week.

Perhaps you ideal day begins with a workout. You sweat it up while thinking about that vacation you are planning, and the business you are building to get there. You invest your work and time heavily into yourself, have lunch with a mentor, then put your head back in the game a few more hours before heading off to happy hour to watch a band with friends. 

Your ideal life routine might be different from either of those scenarios. Consider your ideal routine, and ask yourself if it is do-able. Can you imagine it being a realistic scenario? Given 10 years, do you think you can organize your life in a way that you reach that ideal day? It might be more realistic than you think.

Think about what you wish you had done 10 years ago. What do you wish you had started 10 years ago that you could be working with today? You probably have not just 10 years, but decades ahead of you. You have time to achieve gigantic goals. You just have to identify those goals and work toward them.

5 Year Goals


It’s pretty safe to say that by now, you’ve thought of some 10 year goals. Hopefully you were honest about what you want to have/work toward, and didn’t chalk any up to just being a pipe dream. To help get you there, think about your halfway point. These are your 5 year goals. Let’s take my last brainstorm point, which is to own a condo by Tiger Stadium. It’s doesn’t need to (and won’t) happen by this football season, but I’d really like it to happen. Like many goals, the way to achieve this one is simple: I can begin by saving money, which will allow me to have a large down payment by the time I am ready to act on this. 

1 Year Goals


Think of these like your to do list. You can start on these now. Right now. Make a plan to go by the bank tomorrow and open a new savings account. Deposit a certain amount of money in it each month. Research non-profits to be involved in, with the goal to commit a certain number of hours to it each month. Find a gym you will go to twice a week, a trainer or accountability partner, and do it.

Do you remember the ice bucket challenge? I was lucky enough to be able to jump right in since I was volunteering with the ALS Association. It did great things for advocacy and awareness for ALS!

 

Body Goals

Relating specifically to body goals I want you to really think about what you want. Without inhibition, without guilt, without shame. You own your body. You get to choose your goals. Nobody else. I’ve had several clients females who were very hesitant to share their goals with me. I knew there were things left unspoken so after some gentle but persistent prodding they shared with me that they felt it was unfeminist to have vain body goals.

I think it’s the opposite. A very liberated individual is entitled to feel great in her own skin. You are the only person in your own skin. You have to live in your body all day. If you don’t like how your clothes fit, YOU wear the discomfort all day. Don’t you deserve better? You have to be uncomfortable walking upstairs if you’re out of shape. You have to look in the mirror and feel good or bad about yourself. You own your body and you have every right to decide how you look how you feel and what you want. Feminist or not, you’ll have the right to set your own goals without consulting others. 


Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself. http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/

Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself. 

http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/

And you deserve to feel good in your skin. You own your body.

If you are on a restrictive diet, you’re the one who feels hungry all day, and if you have an eating disorder you’re the one who bears the burden all the time. You owe it to yourself to take care of your health. Your body is an outward manifestation of your health. Who cares what other people want you to look like? You decide for yourself what you want.

 

 

 

Tell Me Your Goals

I am fascinated by the decisions people make. What do you want? What are you working toward? How can I help you get there? Let me know! Email me now. kathryn@kathrynalexander.com


Gabrielle d'Estrées et une de ses soeurs, which hangs in the Louvre.  Gabrielle pinches her sister's nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled.

Gabrielle d’Estrées et une de ses soeurs, which hangs in the Louvre.  Gabrielle pinches her sister’s nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled.

Filed Under: Attitude & Mindset Tagged With: how to, start here, where to start

Get Out of the Summer Slump

July 15, 2015 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

We are deep into summer as I’m writing this. You should be standing in your “after” picture right now. Are you? Remember in January when you looked forward to summer, with ideas of the smokin’ hot body you’d be bringing to boat parties and beach getaways? OH yes, you were gonna kill it in the gym this year. 

Or maybe you’re on that vacation you wanted to get in shape for. The big trip you bought comfortable shoes for, in anticipation of covering miles of meandering European countryside, or walking blocks in the big city. Perhaps your active vacation was carrying golf clubs on your dream course. I hope some of you got to do that. 


summerbeach.jpg

Ahh, summer. A season of long, lazy days that allow us to enjoy a slower pace of life and refill our soul. 

Bahahaha. Don’t worry, you’re in good company if that doesn’t sound like your summer either.

We Are All Busy

One of the biggest perks of my job helping people in the gym is that I interact with a large number of the same people on a very regular basis, and I get to see real trends as they happen.

It is fascinating. We are more alike and in tune with each other than we think. When the seasons change and the weather is beautiful, nearly everyone bounds in the gym with energy and optimism. 

Likewise, I see moments when the collective sentiment is a very unenthusiastic “blah.” This was the case recently in Austin, and could have been caused by low grade, often undetectable mold allergies, according to my acupuncturist. 

This is why I can say with certainly that if you feel like your summer has gotten away from you, you are not alone. 

Summer = Work + Vacation + Kids (even if they are not yours)

Summer is still my favorite time of year (except football season), but it is hard work planning summers. No kidding. If you’re going on vacation, you’ve got to plan with your work and family schedules, book hotels and rental cars and fun things to do. This gets harder, people tell me, when you are packing for kids too. 

This isn’t even the regular summer change of plans if you have kids. You’ve also got to find childcare and summer camps. 


So many red dots.

So many red dots.

Even if you don’t have kids and aren’t taking a vacation, your schedule will likely be changed by others who do. If your profession involves regular appointments with people, you already know it’s crazy with reschedules and cancellations. If you are part of a team at work, you might be taking on extra work for the people out of office. 

And, if you’re among the lucky ones on a long vacation, you’ve surely got your work cut out for you when you come back in the form of emails and calls to return. It’s sometimes more work to just get back into work.

And so, it is easy to see why our fitness routines fall by the wayside in summer. We are half a year removed from New Year’s Resolutions, where the abundant optimism of others propels you along too. We are past that last pre-summer push, which happens in late March and early April. 

There are a couple variations of this one: 

  1. “Ahh, Spring Break is coming! I have GOT to get my booty in gear!”

  2. “Ahh, Spring Break is coming! Hahaha, nevermind. Just kidding. I’m too old for Spring Break. I’ve got a few more weeks before I’ve got to get in shape for summer.”

And then summer comes. And now, summer is here and we’ve got tan lines to show it. 

But you still have goals for your body even when life is busy. You still want your abs to be a little tighter, and to feel more energetic. So what is a busy person to do? 

Simple. Do something now. Anything, but do it now. Do not wait for “the right time” or til life gets a little less busy. It’ll never happen, because as soon as it does, something else gets thrown in your lap. 

Healthy, successful people do not wait for the right time. 

Your Homework

Pick one thing and commit to doing that one thing. What is that one thing? I don’t know. I’ll give you a list of ideas, but I recommend you take a mental inventory of your strengths. You know yourself and your habits better than anyone else. 

Exercise is an extremely nuanced topic we could study forever. There are many-years-long graduate programs of study in exercise, and hundreds of thousands of research studies on exercise. The big things, however, are well understood, and you know which of those you are good at, such as cooking a great healthy chicken salad, or committing to morning yoga classes.

Guidelines

Your activity must be something: 

  • You can do everyday, or with some regularity

  • You are 95% sure you can maintain

See what we are doing here? We are setting you up to be successful. We are setting you up to win.

The Rules

  • Commit to doing this thing for one month. You can continue on if you like, but it’s perfectly fine to quit at one month.

  • No guilt! No guilt if you miss a day. Just prepare better so you can do it tomorrow.

Give this some thought, then if you choose to commit, give it a real, honest go. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant the action is. You are making a commitment, making positive change, and establishing a habit.

Why Just One Thing?

People do better at change where there is only one change to focus on. After your month, you can pick a different one or add another. Remember, the smallest healthy change you make is better for you the the best comprehensive health overhaul that you abandon. Reason #2 for just one thing, I always wanted to make a cheesy title like that. “Do this one weird trick!!” Haha!

Examples:

  • Stretch for 15 minutes every evening

  • Attend yoga or Pilates class 3 times a week

  • Floss your teeth every day

  • Drink 64 ounces of water every day

  • Weight train 3 times per week

  • Get 8 hours of sleep every day

  • Cook a healthy breakfast every morning

  • Have 2 boiled eggs every morning for the 12 extra grams of protein

  • Meditate for 15 minutes every day

  • Do a challenging sudoku or crossword puzzle every day

  • Express gratitude every day

  • Give a genuine compliment every day

  • Walk around your block every morning

  • Consume approximately 25/38 grams of fiber per day (female/male, respectively)

One final note. Email me if you need accountability! Email me to tell me your habit! I would love to update this list with healthy habits I haven’t mentioned, and I’m fantastic at nagging, I mean, checking in to see how you are sticking to your plan.

I’m off to meditate, my goal for the next month!

Filed Under: Training Tagged With: start here, training, where to start

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