fulfillment

Why Gym Memberships Are an Amazing Value

August 30, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander 2 Comments

To celebrate back to school time, let’s do math!

A word problem:

Sally joins a gym for $60 a month. She goes 3 times a week faithfully and loses fat, gets stronger, and feels amazing. She even sleeps better and feels more confident at work!

All this for $4.28 a pop. ($60 divided by 14 visits in a month like August.)

Let’s assume she actually enjoys being at the gym and goes 4 times a week. That would be $3.33 a visit! Where else can you go for $3.33 an hour, while simultaneous improving yourself, your health, and your future?

Hint: It’s not actually a math problem.

It’s kind of rhetorical, but it has an answer. The answer is, nowhere!

Nowhere else is as economically rewarding as a gym!

"CAN YALL PUT IN A PUNCHING BAG PLEASE". He was very polite. — “CAN YALL PUT IN A PUNCHING BAG PLEASE”. He was very polite.

I understand the phrase “different strokes for different folks” and I get that not everyone enjoys the gym, but I have never understood why people balk at the price of a gym membership.

It’s $30-$60 a month for an activity many people enjoy. This can take 2-6 hours of your week and put it to good use, while you are surrounded by like-minded people.

For $30-$60. (Don’t pay more; the mega gyms are crap. Oh, and don’t pay less. Planet Fitness is worse crap.)

"Please put in a punching bag if possible." — “Please put in a punching bag if possible.”

What else are you going to do with that amount of time that will be as productive, enjoyable, and beneficial to your health? Nothing!

I can’t think of a cheaper hobby! I grew up a horse lover, and can I tell you how much more money I have now that my hobby is at the gym and not the barn? Lots!

What else are you gonna do with that time? Happy hour? $10 drinks? Or worse, shop, like my idle hands do? The safest place my wallet can be is at the gym.

Life is short. Spend it somewhere you enjoy!

More importantly than the economics of it, we have one short life. Spend it somewhere good!

"Punching Bag - Thanks". Still polite. — “Punching Bag – Thanks”. Still polite.

Have you heard theory of the third place? Ray Oldenberg suggested our third place is where we go after work (our second place) and before home (our first place). It is a place we choose to go, where we enjoy the social interaction. More info here.

Gyms are our third place. They are where we want to go, and hang with people who want to be there. They understand our drive, our sticking points, and see us through them. They become our friends and sometimes chosen family.

Join the boxing gym!

I found something interesting today. Interesting in a trippy, time-warpy kind of way. It was a peek into human psychology, and it equally frustrated and amused me, as my mom and sister can attest.

"punching bag in here would be a great addition Thanks" — “punching bag in here would be a great addition Thanks”

My sister came across these notes tucked in an old brief case of mine. They were from one of two gyms I worked at concurrently many years ago. I can’t be sure of which gym, and I’m definitely not violating any confidentiality issues here.

I wasn’t the manager or owner of this gym, and I can assure you good gym owners love feedback. I’m certainly not complaining about this guy’s wanting a punching bag.

But, here’s this guy’s problem: he is looking for a niche activity in the wrong place. He is looking for a boxing gym in a health club. Yes yes, I know some clubs have heavy bags and speed bags, but if he really wants to box, he should go to a boxing gym.

If he’s a good boxer, he will need better equipment than a multi-use gym facility will provide. He would outgrow the basic heavy bag and still not be happy with this gym set up. Also if he is or aspires to be an accomplished boxer, it will be worth it to him to be around other boxers, people he can sweat with and learn from.

"More Free Weights and punching bag" — “More Free Weights and punching bag”

"Punching Bag Please" — “Punching Bag Please”

I encourage everybody to join a gym or a group. Whether it’s a regular neighborhood gym or a specialized gym, it will be worth it!

So here’s my advice for this dude with the bee in his…boxers. Join a boxing gym. Just do it! Join a boxing gym!!

"It would be wonderful to have a punching bag to get my perfect body on." I never met the guy but I like him; I bet he's got a great sense of humor! — “It would be wonderful to have a punching bag to get my perfect body on.” I never met the guy but I like him; I bet he’s got a great sense of humor!

It’s worth the money if it’s that important to you.

It’s worth the money if you’ll get that much enjoyment from it.

What’s the takeaway? Join a gym! Find your niche. It could be a regular fitness gym, a specialized gym, but join somewhere you want to go. Be grateful that you have somewhere to multitask so hard: get healthy, improve yourself, save money and bad calories you’d be wasting elsewhere, and be in good company!

I'm not sure if they ever got a punching bag. I hope he found his place! — I’m not sure if they ever got a punching bag. I hope he found his place!

What to do When Life Gets Crazy (Taking Ownership, Part 2)

July 26, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander 1 Comment

Last week I covered the importance of taking ownership of your life to get what you want. The process of creating new habits takes effort at the beginning, but it becomes easy once you are in the routine. Your workouts will make you feel good all day and sleep better at night. Healthy meals will help you lose fat and avoid the random energy slumps during the day.

Once this becomes second nature and you are in your groove, you will wonder how you lived before feeling so good. It seems easy. You’ll see.

Then, BAM. Life will hit you.

You’ll get a reminder that you aren’t actually completely in charge. More often than not, it will be a small but significant change that throws off your schedule, such as:

a minor injury that doesn’t require extensive treatment but necessitates change in your workouts
a change in work schedule
a vacation that throws your train off the tracks just long enough to shift your momentum
new responsibilities that take more of your time

Not all of these are even bad events. The work change can be because of a promotion, and vacations are sometimes the sweetest parts of life.

How to Handle a Small Disturbance

Plan for one week

These small but significant changes are often temporary. Sometimes you know the time frame, other times they go on indefinitely. In both cases, plan for the upcoming week. Just one week. Pack workout clothes to exercise at a different time of the day and scope out healthy fast food near you. You might even plan for fewer workouts this week, and that is OK! See how you manage this one test week and adjust accordingly.

If do fewer workouts, that’s ok; acknowledge that you are choosing how to spend your time, like you do a fiscal budget. Don’t say “I can’t, I don’t have time.” Acknowledge that your time was better served knocking down your to do list, and that you’re going to get back on it tomorrow or next week.

About Injuries

If you have a small, non serious injury, continue to workout around it. If your wrist is bothering you, don’t skip the gym! Go, and work the things you can. Lunges, step ups, possibly other cardio. Or go for a walk or run! Likewise, if your knee or hip hurts, continue to get your upper body and core stability work in. If getting to the gym takes an almost unreal amount of motivation for you, then it’s even more important that you don’t quit going! Go, and stretch. Go, and work the 3 exercises you can safely. Don’t lose your momentum!

Look to Learn from Others

Look around at other people who are in your position and successfully managing to do what you want to do. Ask the guy in your office who seems really fit how he handles the work hours, home life, and fits in exercise. He might know a killer cafe just off your regular path, or a great little gym you weren’t aware of.

Ask the busiest people you know how they manage their time. (Protip: be respectful of people’s time. Ask a succinct and specific question: “I have noticed that even when you’re super busy, you’re very successful. How do you manage all your work responsibilities, and find time to eat healthy with your family?)

Cut Down On Your Workout Frequency

This might not be what you expected me to say, but it’s absolutely ok. Sometimes you are just in a phase of life where you cannot workout as much. It’s OK to be on a maintenance plan. Re-evaluate your schedule, adjust accordingly, and find the best option. Workout twice a week if that’s all you can do. Take a half mile walk around the block twice a week if that’s all you can manage.

How to Handle a Large Disturbance

Unlike a minor setback, large changes in your life can be tremendously challenging and stressful for long durations. These are the worst of bad situations that only happen a few times in life.

This is when life dumps bad things on you, when everything is wrong, all at once; when you are stretched to your limit emotionally. This is usually serious and painful, like an illness threatening yourself or a loved one, or an extremely challenging work program.

Reframe

Step back and identify your main goal. What do you need to do? Get through residency. Graduate from the fire academy. See your chemotherapy through. Care for your mother, who is caring for your father, who has ALS. Support your wife while she’s exhausted, up with the new baby every 3 hours, all day.

Don’t work toward your exercise goals as aggressively during this time. Remember, these are the times you train for. You train for exactly this, to be healthy when you need to be, to be mentally sound when others need you to be. To have great habits to fall back upon, so that even your “unhealthy” isn’t disastrous.

Be Kind to Yourself

Be honest about what you can do. If you are extremely taxed emotionally or physically, you won’t recover as well, so your workouts cannot be as strenuous. Same scenario if you aren’t sleeping as well.

What do you like to do? Put on your favorite music and stretch? Do that for 10 minutes a day. Get a spontaneous walk around the office when you finished a project early.

In short, remember that moving and eating well will make you feel better, which can make the tougher times easier to handle. However, you must be kind to yourself and give yourself a break if you aren’t your usual superman or woman.

Remember, this too, shall pass.

11 Things You Must Stop Doing to Make Your Workouts – and Life – Better

May 28, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

We are so often told what to do: eat at this restaurant, add this new exercise into your routine, buy this, wear that! What if, instead of doing more and adding more, you would benefit by letting some things go? Bad habits can weigh you down and make your life harder.

My challenge to you is to identify which of these habits you can change for your benefit, and start applying them today. Please feel free to reach out to me if I can help in this process. I’d be honored to help you start living a happier life!

1. Stop Attaching Your Ego to Your Body

Your self worth and your body are two unrelated things. Yes, I want you to feel great about your body! It is a fantastic thing to have an outward symbol of your hard work and be proud of what you have achieved with your physique. Committing to a workout routine also helps develop discipline and faith in a process.

But these things do not make your self worth.

They do not make you kind or intelligent or worthy. Even if you skip a workout, break a leg, or gain fat, you are still all the good things you were before. Keep working toward your fitness and physique goals, but remember who you are, what you are good at, and the people you help. Then hold that in your head regardless of your physical status.

2. Stop Going After Other People’s Goals.

For some odd reason, strangers and non strangers alike feel compelled to offer their unsolicited opinions and judgements regarding others’ workouts. “Don’t get too big!”, “Don’t do this exercise or you’ll get bulky.” “I don’t want to be onstage in a speedo!” (It’s not a speedo, by the way; nobody’s swimming here.) Why this is acceptable is beyond my comprehension!

You own your body, your time, and your effort, so you get to pick what you work for.

If you want to be a powerlifter, train hard for strength! If you want to compete in a physique contest, it’s ok if your social circle doesn’t understand. You’ll be infinitely more motivated when you are honest with yourself about your goals. Then go at them!

3. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

I encourage you to find a training environment where people work hard, have structured goals, smart programs, and compete. I cannot overstate how important it is to be surrounded by people who are smarter, more experienced, and stronger than you are. Training in this type of environment will improve your motivation and results tremendously. You will learn and it will drive you to be better.

However, this does not mean you should look at someone who is the same age, the same weight, or has some other factor in common, and think you should be able to do exactly what that person is doing. Absolutely not! Why? Because you have a different body. You have a different training history.

Work as hard as you can to reach your goals, and your training potential. This might include having mentors and workout partners, and even competitive rivals. That is great! Chase them! But do not put yourself down because you don’t have the exact abilities as someone else.

4. Stop Procrastinating

You aren’t going to be in shape, disciplined, and experienced when you start. Just start! You’ll get stronger and work smarter as you go. Just start!

5. Stop Pushing Through Injuries

Many competitors, or people with competitive personalities, are the exact opposite of lazy. This trait is what drives them toward excellence and success, but like Achilles, can also be a downfall. If an injury doesn’t respond to a short period of rest, frequently recurs, or causes debilitating pain, it is not worth pushing through. Know when to go see a doctor to save you damage and time in the long run.

6. Stop Making Excuses

There is a psychological benefit to making an excuse. It removes control from you and places it onto another factor, which makes you feel better your actions or inaction. Blaming your busy work schedule for skipping workouts is easy to do, and easy to justify. You have to make ends meet, right? The problem is, it doesn’t help you. It doesn’t help your family you are working so hard to provide for.

Ever heard the expression, “There is nothing new under the sun”? Literally every problem you can think of, someone else has overcome. Someone out there has had that problem, a worse work schedule, more children to take care of, and still figured out a way to practice healthy habits. If it’s important enough to you, be honest about what you can do, and do it!

7. Stop Doing Things That Take You Farther Away From Your Goals

We all know the things we should do. Do your workouts, eat your protein and vegetables, go to the dentist, etc. We check those off a list when we do them. (And you list makers, I know you write them in to your list when you’ve done them, just so you can check them off. Hey, I do it too.)

Consider all the small things that take you farther away from your goals. Skipping a meal, not eating enough protein, not drinking enough water, and staying up too late. These things seem small but they add up. If you are serious about changing your life, your body, and your habits, identify these issues and address them.

8. Stop Drifting

Write down goals and work toward them. If you don’t have specific goals you are working toward, you roll into the gym when you feel like it, work what you feel like working, and go home when you feel like it. This is okay sometimes. It happens on reload weeks, or on vacation when you are improvising in a different gym, but it really won’t serve you best in the long term. For what to do about this, see below.

9. Stop Program Hopping

One of the biggest keys to success is following a well designed program. Sure you can make progress without a program, but you’ll get there faster with a program, and who doesn’t want to get there faster? An effective program has a plan, structure, and a big picture. It will stay consistent, or change only slightly, for a period of weeks. Stay with it!

Do not change simply because you’re bored. Do not attempt to “shock your body” by adding a bunch of random crap to your workouts, or by sticking your finger in an electrical socket. Squeeze all the effectiveness you can out of a program by improving upon the workout each time you do it. That’s hard to do when it changes more than you wash your coffee mug.

The best way to find a good program is to seek out a qualified trainer who has experience programming. Talk to the people in your gym to find out who they have worked with, who they liked, and what brought results.

10. Stop Being in a Rut

This sounds like a contradiction to the previous point, but it is not. Hear me out. A rut does not progress, never changes, and does not deliver results. It may be comfortable, and it may have even delivered results at one time. It doesn’t anymore, but hey, it’s better than nothing, right? Maybe. But why settle for better than nothing? Go for better than that!

11. Stop Obsessing- Live Life!

Do a little bit of research to find a workout plan that you can stick to. Have faith, give it time, and do it with gusto! Balance out your hard work a positive attitude, good food, and enough sleep. Then go out and have fun! Enjoy your newfound energy, vigor, and live your life!

I’m excited to share these tips with you and cannot wait for you to apply these strategies and experience the benefits in your life. I’m ready to see you succeed!

How to Get What You Want: A Foolproof Guide to Setting and Achieving Big Goals, In and Out of the Gym

May 1, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

Les Brown says, “Shoot for the moon and even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”

Selena Gomez sings, “The heart wants what it wants.”

I don’t want the moon. Ever since I watched Apollo 13, space flight has seriously freaked me out. I’m grateful for NASA and people with steelier nerves than me, but I am not Elon Musk. This girl enjoy warm showers and abundant oxygen.

What if your heart really doesn’t know what it wants? There was a time when knew I didn’t like my job, and I had aspirations of improving myself, being happier, living for the moment and other regurgitated platitudes, but I didn’t know how to get there. Those are emotions, not actionable goals. They are vague. How do you get there, that ambiguous place where you are happy and present? Where is there?

Further, how do I know what my heart wants? This is also a vague question. Not every person knows from a young age exactly what career path or life goal he or she wants. Often, people are in painful situations precisely because they don’t know what they want. As for me, I’m a literal person. My masters degree is clinical exercise physiology. Between the AV node, QRS complex and cardiac output, I think my heart is just telling me to go run more stairs.

Goal Setting Takes Work

Goal setting can be hard, both in life and in the gym. It takes deep thought, consideration, and time to decide what you want out of life. What you are really deciding on is where to spend your time and that is a hugely difficult decision! Time is the most valuable resource, one that no brilliant researcher or billionaire has found a way to create more of.

What is most worthy of spending your time working toward?

You Start Where You Start

Begin by acknowledging this: you start where you start. You can try to deny it and jump ahead, but it will only hurt you. You are in a factual situation; if you are 15 credits and a thesis away from a degree, you have 15 credits and a thesis to go. If you can squat 150 pounds, you can squat 150 pounds. In the gym, trying to skip steps and start at a place too advanced can hurt you. There is no shame in starting where you are.

How to Decide What You Want

Get out your calendar right now. Schedule two separate half hour chunks of time where you sit down and think.

At this first session, sit by yourself, put your phone on airplane mode in the next room over, and let your mind wander. This is a brainstorming session in which you don’t cut down anything. You can decide later if it’s a bigger goal than you are willing to work toward. For now, just think about possibilities.

Ask yourself these questions:

What do I want my ideal workday to look like one year from now?

I want to  teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too. — I want to teach my clients to flip tires all day! Halfway kidding. We do other things too.

Where do I want to retire?
Who am I good at helping?
What am I good at doing?
What do I enjoy doing?
What do I need to be happy?
What do I want to be happy?

These are malleable goals. Do not stress yourself into thinking there is one perfect vision of life you are chasing. You can adjust goals as you go. People naturally do this all the time. College students begin by declaring a major, take some classes, and either confirm their decision or change it. People in the workforce have mid-life career changes and restructure their whole lives to change jobs.

In the gym, people begin working toward one goal and shift toward another. Bikini competitors begin train for a show and realize they like powerlifting. Crossfitters will begin prescribed workouts and decide to focus on Olympic lifting. These things are allowed to happen! They are all part of finding what you naturally enjoy and do well.

How to Decide What You Want, Session 2

At your next half hour goal session, rewrite these thoughts into more accomplishable goals. Take these point by point and break them down into less abstract feelings and more concrete action steps.

For example, my brainstorming session 1 looked similar to this:

I want to be happy! I want to be flexible and live on my own terms. I’m not happy in an office 40 hours a week, and I always gravitate back toward the gym, even though the last “office job” I had was in fitness and only a few hours a day at a desk. One of my favorite things in the gym is teaching the deadlift for the first time, and watching people realize they are stronger than they thought.

I want to help people. I hate hate hate ALS and want to help people with it, but I keep getting my tender heart broken every time I get to know another patient who is living with ALS. How can I help and not be sad all the time? We need to find a cure.

I want to go to Paris again, and travel more! I want to learn French, but I could spend all that time reading more exercise research. Hmm.

To accomplish: drive my big lifts up (bench press, deadlift, squat). Get big shoulders. Also I want to want to do yoga, but haven’t decided if I want to.

Longer term goal: I will have a condo by Tiger Stadium to stay in when I go to football games.

True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don't speak … — True story: one of my goals was to visit France to see my friend Marion, who was an exchange student at my high school. It took me 15 years, but we spent my 31st birthday walking miles around Paris and catching up. In English, because I don’t speak French.

These are a good start. They are inherently pretty vague and selfish. Take the first one, for example. “Be happy, and live on my own terms.” Yes, we all want to be happy. That’s froo froo talk. What does it take for me to be happy? For starters, enjoying what I do for work. I can’t just clock in and clock out. Happiness also means seeing live music often, since that is my favorite pastime outside the gym. Spending time with my family is a priority.

Regarding my rambling goals about helping people: this is a great start too. James 2:26 says, “Faith without works is dead.” Similarly, it is a kind intention to want to help people, but I need to act on it. Instead of just sending well wishes into the atmosphere, I am going to volunteer with Max’s Ride (a non-profit motorcycle ride and concert which benefits ALS patients), and the ALS Association.

From looking at these first two points with the goal to act on them, I can say that to be happy, and fulfilled, I need to teach lifting as a career. I love reading science journals, so the ethical continuing education is enjoyable for me. I will make it a point to get my friends together to watch live music, visit out of town family members, and volunteer with local organizations against ALS.

Pull out your brainstorming list and think strategically about how to make those softer goals more tangible. Nothing is wrong with the softer goals, but if you can’t think of a plan to reach them, you probably won’t reach them.

Make 1, 5, and 10 Year Goals

Now that you have made a big, general brainstorm about what you want out of life, and you’ve restructured those wants into processes to reach them, think about that career question again. What do you wish your ideal workday looked like today?

Perhaps you would wake up, take your children to school, and head to the office. It’s not a cake walk, but you get some concentrated, hard work done on a satisfying challenge. At a good break point, you head to the gym, blow off some steam and sweat a bit, and head home for a cell-phone free dinner with the family.

I'm a happy girl if I can watch live music every week. — I’m a happy girl if I can watch live music every week.

Perhaps you ideal day begins with a workout. You sweat it up while thinking about that vacation you are planning, and the business you are building to get there. You invest your work and time heavily into yourself, have lunch with a mentor, then put your head back in the game a few more hours before heading off to happy hour to watch a band with friends.

Your ideal life routine might be different from either of those scenarios. Consider your ideal routine, and ask yourself if it is do-able. Can you imagine it being a realistic scenario? Given 10 years, do you think you can organize your life in a way that you reach that ideal day? It might be more realistic than you think.

Think about what you wish you had done 10 years ago. What do you wish you had started 10 years ago that you could be working with today? You probably have not just 10 years, but decades ahead of you. You have time to achieve gigantic goals. You just have to identify those goals and work toward them.

5 Year Goals

It’s pretty safe to say that by now, you’ve thought of some 10 year goals. Hopefully you were honest about what you want to have/work toward, and didn’t chalk any up to just being a pipe dream. To help get you there, think about your halfway point. These are your 5 year goals. Let’s take my last brainstorm point, which is to own a condo by Tiger Stadium. It’s doesn’t need to (and won’t) happen by this football season, but I’d really like it to happen. Like many goals, the way to achieve this one is simple: I can begin by saving money, which will allow me to have a large down payment by the time I am ready to act on this.

1 Year Goals

Think of these like your to do list. You can start on these now. Right now. Make a plan to go by the bank tomorrow and open a new savings account. Deposit a certain amount of money in it each month. Research non-profits to be involved in, with the goal to commit a certain number of hours to it each month. Find a gym you will go to twice a week, a trainer or accountability partner, and do it.

Do you remember the ice bucket challenge? I was lucky enough to be able to jump right in since I was volunteering with the ALS Association. It did great things for advocacy and awareness for ALS!

Body Goals

Relating specifically to body goals I want you to really think about what you want. Without inhibition, without guilt, without shame. You own your body. You get to choose your goals. Nobody else. I’ve had several clients females who were very hesitant to share their goals with me. I knew there were things left unspoken so after some gentle but persistent prodding they shared with me that they felt it was unfeminist to have vain body goals.

I think it’s the opposite. A very liberated individual is entitled to feel great in her own skin. You are the only person in your own skin. You have to live in your body all day. If you don’t like how your clothes fit, YOU wear the discomfort all day. Don’t you deserve better? You have to be uncomfortable walking upstairs if you’re out of shape. You have to look in the mirror and feel good or bad about yourself. You own your body and you have every right to decide how you look how you feel and what you want. Feminist or not, you’ll have the right to set your own goals without consulting others.

Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself. http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/ — Photo by Matthew DeFeo, during a period of time where I took great care of myself.

http://www.matthewdefeophotography.com/

And you deserve to feel good in your skin. You own your body.

If you are on a restrictive diet, you’re the one who feels hungry all day, and if you have an eating disorder you’re the one who bears the burden all the time. You owe it to yourself to take care of your health. Your body is an outward manifestation of your health. Who cares what other people want you to look like? You decide for yourself what you want.

Tell Me Your Goals

I am fascinated by the decisions people make. What do you want? What are you working toward? How can I help you get there? Let me know! Email me now. kathryn@kathrynalexander.com

Gabrielle d'Estrées et une de ses soeurs, which hangs in the Louvre.  Gabrielle pinches her sister's nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled. — *Gabrielle d’Estrées et une de ses soeurs,* which hangs in the Louvre. Gabrielle pinches her sister’s nipple, meaning her sister is pregnant. This is both funny and heartwarming at once, and I would never have seen it if I had not traveled.

What’s So Special About the New Year?

January 2, 2016 by Kathryn Alexander Leave a Comment

It’s a Friday. Fridays are pretty fun even when they aren’t January 1, but there are 52 Fridays in a year. What’s different about this one?

Why is it filled with hope and unbridled optimism and the promise of #bigthingstocome?

It’s a Friday.

It’s different though. It’s not like any other Friday. It’s the first day of a new year! It’s different and it’s special just for that.

It’s the first day called 2016, it’s a clean slate, a blanket of fresh snow. And sometimes that in itself is the last little bit of motivation we need to start a new habit.

What are your New Year’s Resolutions?

Take a minute and think of them right now.

I’m going to guess:

lose weight
exercise more
be a better husband or wife
spend more quality time with your kids
enjoy life more fully
save more money and pay down debt
get organized

Are those new thoughts? Did those goals just come to you this morning? No! Absolutely not! They are things you’ve wanted many times before. How many times have you looked at that piece of cake at the office party and thought, “I shouldn’t eat this.”

How many times have you tucked your kids in bed only to realize that the day was another exhausting blur of carpools, practices, and homework. You’ve wished you had put away your phone, your kids’ homework, and spent more quality time with them.

You’ve wished you actually committed to that workout. You wish you actually used your gym key tag.

Why didn’t you do that already? Well, many reasons, and they are all okay. You are human. You are busy, you are obligated to people and tasks, but you have the best of intentions.

Forgiveness

Consider the act of forgiveness. It is an immensely kind act to do for yourself, when you can acknowledge and release others’ transgressions. It doesn’t require any specific formality or documentation. No attorneys, witnesses or notaries. It is simply an shift in your mindset.

The new year presents us a similar opportunity. It gives us an occasion to put away the old guilt and failures, the missed workouts, the regrets for time lost. It gives us an occasion to start anew, making healthier, kinder choices that will truly fulfill us.

So take this opportunity to make resolutions. Everybody else is! Gyms are bustling. Vegetables are flying off the grocery shelves. You are practically globally supported! Make your resolutions fun, do-able, and specifically beneficial to you. Sounds silly, but doesn’t “lose 11 pounds of fat” sounds better than “lose weight”? “Go to the gym 3 times a week” will guide you better than “exercise more”.

The key to resolutions is to harness the energy of the new year, but remember that these goals are set up to become new lifelong habits which aren’t attached to any particular calendar date.

Here are some suggestions for resolutions in case you haven’t come up with any. Don’t pick all of these, but choose and adapt 1 or 2 if they will help you.

Drink 64 ounce of water every day.
Prepare a healthy breakfast every day.
Go for an exercise walk or jog 3 times a week.
Write in a gratitude journal 3 times a week.
Set your alarm, then put your phone on Do Not Disturb by 7:00 pm every night. (This is my favorite! Love you all, but I need my beauty sleep!)

Here’s to a Brilliant 2016!

One more thing: email me and tell me your resolutions! Let me know how they progress. I want to know if you have success with them, if you modify them, if you can positively influence your family and friends through them.

kathryn@kathrynalexander.com

Let me know!

Bring it, 2016.